Day 13: Compose a series of vignettes

Today I ran a so-called Cooper Test. I do that once every month. After five minutes of warm-up:

The voice tells me on my premium Endomondo app.

“Run your fastest in twelve minutes”!

I really don’t like it, but I chose to do it anyway just to improve my running speed and endurance. Today I told my self to decide to like it. So I talked to myself saying:

“I like this”

image

 

at least I like the result and the feeling afterwards. “Soon” the twelve minutes were over and I walked home thinking about today’s assignment.


A picture came to me of a little mermaid from Copenhagen. Not the famous one all the tourists go to see at the harbor. She is so calm and beautiful. This sculpture by Anne-Marie Nielsen, the wife of the famous Danish composer Carl Nielsen, is placed at our Royal Library “The Black Diamond” also along the harbor. She is gasping for air and that’s why I thought of her running my fastest. As the twelve minutes developed I was gasping more and more for air and I hoped no farmer was around to hear the sounds I was making in the effort. No only a few horses and a dog were around.

I could use my Cooper test experience as a springboard to get something done in the house that I have a tendency to postpone as cleaning the windows or to tidy the rooms.

This little bronze mermaid is expressing deep anxiety and exhaustion.

By A.M. Nielsen in Copenhagen

By A.M. Nielsen in Copenhagen

I thought of the Jewish most important day Yom Kippur, which is today. The Day of Atonement a day to repent and to be restored. As a born again Christian I believe that Jesus Christ made the sacrifice for me and for everybody who will receive it.

I thought about how I once treated my own children. Something that I regret immensely and I can’t believe that I could act like that. I worked far from home and had long transportation and they were on their own in a time where they were not mature enough to manage sufficiently. I contributed to a lack of emotional stability. It hurts to think about it. I have told them, but I will find a way to do it again. I wrote a post about that time here called “Going back 25 Years”.


When Yom Kippur is over the year of Jubilee starts. That’s where the captives are set free and the debt cancelled.

Luke 4:18( Amplified Bible) – He has sent Me to announce release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to send forth as delivered those who are oppressed ( who are downtrodden, bruised, crushed, and broken by calamity.)

This verse has been a key verse to me for many years and a great comfort to go back to.

Today’s task led me to think of physical, emotional and spiritual things.

9 Comments »

  1. I talk about making amends in my blog too. And one of my vignettes has to do with asking my kids for their forgiveness. I’m sure you did the best you could at that point in your life as did I…however, today I can be more sensitive to their needs (even though they are adults now) as can you. I feel ok about myself today. I hope you do too…

    https://minick1943.wordpress.com/2015/09/23/writing-101-day-13-vignettes-of-the-heart/

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sometimes Maria you just have to do whatever seems best at the time. You are not alone in wishing sometimes that we could go back and do it all differently. Many of us know that feeling that you’re “just trying to get to work” and feeling kids are being neglected but we can’t do everything.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi Maria. I felt your mom-thoughts in your words and thank you for sharing this. I think you did your best for your kids. I really this so because mothers always tried to give their best and all that they could give to their children. 🙂

    Like

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